Hidden in the Heart...

Hey guys, so I posted this blog on my own this morning and felt I should it add it to this one. This is not an easy one to share so I hope it blesses and speaks to you.

Many people know my story. They know my struggles I have overcome with Christ. They know my Egypt. The thing about Egypt is that those who walked out of it had experienced so much pain, they doubted God would follow through. They complained and demanded the moment something went wrong. They didn't know how to trust in God because their past had hurt them and blinded them to the love and mercy of God. I think about my own life, my own heart, my trust and my faith. Recently old memories came to my mind, things I have done, the choices I made and I didn't feel like it was me who did them. Someone from my past has been stuck in my brain, I don't know why. I haven't talked to this person in so long that I am not sure if they know how much I have changed or where my life is now. Last night I asked God why this person keeps coming up in my mind. This person was one who I had hurt so many times very deeply and they hurt me just as much. I had dream with this person. It wasn't anything big, and too much to explain. I woke up and mulled the dream over in my mind and prayed about it. Then I realized, there was some hurts in my heart and I never realized it. There was some old wounds that I hadn't let go of. I am working on it. I need to go to that secret quiet place and let God create and remove, and restore that area. This person, someone I haven't seen or talked to in two years, still had a hold. Isn't amazing that the last couple weeks I couldn't hear or feel God? And it turns out there is an area of my heart kept from Him? I see how the old hurt and pain surfaced when my current life started to get shaky. Our past can't follow into our present. We wander, some for days or weeks, others for decades like the Israelites and Moses. Do I want to keep any part of my heart from God? NO WAY!

Today, look into your heart and determine what has to go, from your past and today that hinders you. That causes you to doubt God. You can't keep going when you have held onto something. We do, we keep things locked in our hearts and sometimes don't even know it. Let's be free. Let God be the Healer and Redeemer. Give up the things that hold you down and grab onto Him and don't let go.

-Mary